Following on from the success of Fairtrade coffee drinks, Starbucks has announced that a new ‘Fairtax’ suite of products will be launched next week.
Chairman and CEO, Howard Schultz, said, ‘For a slight premium, our new Fairtax coffees allow you to drink your triple skinny latte, content in the knowledge that some your money will actually go to the tax authorities in your own country. You know, to pay for public services and shit and stuff.’
‘This new Fairtax range will help to make those who sit in our cafes, reading Kindles, updating Facebook statuses and pretending to write novels, feel that much better about themselves. Especially if they’re on a Vodafone network.’
When challenged about claims that only 4p, of the extra £1 charged, went to the government, Schultz was defiant. ‘We have administration costs to cover you know; including setting up a whole new accounting and payment system. This is the first time we’ve ever paid tax to the UK government and the costs have to be covered.’