Motorists paying a visit to Ditton Bridge Auto Repairs will now be offered hand relief with their new exhaust or an oil change, as local mechanic Tony Barragan strives to halt a slide in business at his garage.
‘Everyone who has a penis enjoys having it rubbed to climax, and adding this service could make the difference between us staying in business or not,’ said the garage-owner, outlining the thinking behind his new business strategy, ‘I’m sure I can pull it off.’
Initial reaction has been positive, with most clients praising Tony’s no-nonsense approach to car repairs and hand-jobs. ‘Polite, thorough and professional: The brake lights on my Volvo Estate now work fine, and I ejaculated into his oily rag just like he said I would,’ was a typical review posted on-line, while many motorists pointed out that it made nice change from just getting shafted.
The Bogs