The new Governor of the Bank of England, Mark Carney, has surprised observers by revealing that his predecessor, Mervyn King, had in fact successfully cultivated a magic money tree inside the Bank.
The prime minister was said to be ‘angry and embarrassed’ at the revelation, which directly contradicted his earlier claim that no such tree existed and therefore everything would have to be cut drastically.
Downing Street has yet to release an official response to the news, but a source suggested that the tree is probably a rare specimen of quantitativus easingii. ‘We’re pretty sure that this type of plant only grows Euros,’ said the source, ‘which as everybody knows will probably be worthless by this time next week.’
Former governor King says he is ‘untroubled’ by the furore, asking: ‘Well, how did he think we conjured up all that new money? Print it?’