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Mexican standoff at Weston-super-Mare roundabout reaches third day

only thing moving for three days was their eyesThe drivers of three Nissan Micras who have all been giving way to each other at a mini-roundabout in Weston-Super-Mare have been given emergency rations by concerned locals as their stand-off passes the three day mark.

The three vehicles all reached the mini-roundabout from different directions at the same time on Friday afternoon, and all gave way to each other. ‘I can’t go until the car approaching the roundabout from my right has cleared the junction,’ explained one of the drivers, 92-year-old Arnold Jenkins, ‘but she can’t go until the car coming from her right has gone, and he can’t go until I’ve gone. I think we’re going to be stuck here forever, and I’m running low on boiled sweets.’

A resolution was almost reached early on Sunday morning, as one of the Micras amazed onlookers by taking the initiative and edging forwards a couple of feet, but unfortunately the other two also edged forward at the same time, narrowly missing each other by about twenty feet before reversing back to their original positions. ‘It was pretty scary’ confirmed Micra driver Wendy Turner, 81. ‘Another five minutes of edging forward painfully slowly and it could have been carnage out there.’

The other Micra driver, 88-year-old Brian Hill, said that he had tried beeping his horn at one point, but to no avail. ‘I gave it a good toot, just the one mind, but it didn’t do any good. Those other two drivers must be deaf. I would have looked to see whether they had hearing aids, but as I can barely see past my bonnet I didn’t bother.’

Hollywood director Quentin Tarantino, who includes Mexican standoffs in practically all of his films, said he liked the new twist and would consider putting a mini-roundabout in his next movie, as long as the Micras could be replaced with vintage Cadillacs, he could think of a suitably inappropriate yet cool soundtrack and the standoff could end with all three drivers shooting each other in the eye.

A spokesman for Avon and Somerset police advised motorists to avoid the area for the foreseeable future, although he was hopeful that the problem might be resolved on pension day, when all three drivers are likely to start muscling everyone and everything out of their way to get the front of the Post Office queue.

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Posted: May 13th, 2013 by ianslat

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