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New Iranian president promises to reform Scrabble app

The newly-elected reformist Iranian president, Hassan Rouhani, has declared that his first act in office will be to reform the widely-derided Scrabble smartphone app.

Mr Rouhani has spoken about the need to re-engage with the West, free political prisoners and return to the traditional Chambers dictionary. The 64-year-old cleric often described as “moderate” has long been a critic of the oppression by EA Games particularly of the people of SimCity.

Outgoing President, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, has led his country through a period of economic turmoil, with very few triple word scores and only a handful of ‘bingos’. His reactionary regime has often been criticised for its nuclear programme and the continued inflated scoring of the letter Z, while ignoring the fact that V is so much harder to get out. There are 50 million Iranians eligible to vote, the majority of whom are furious that their Scrabble player history has been wiped on Facebook.

Many Shi’a Islamists are concerned that Westernization could lead to acceptance of the North American (NASPA-sanctioned) and Israeli ‘Double Challenge’ penalty. One cleric said: ‘We want reform, but the pace of reform most be moderate. Acronyms or abbreviations will not be permitted. We will not enter into a dialogue with the Zionist ‘Words with Friends’. But we are open to the idea of awarding three points for G and M.’

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Posted: Jun 21st, 2013 by Wrenfoe

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