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UK Border Agency introduces height restrictions for visitors to Britain

Human rights groups have reacted angrily to news that a 1.9 metre height restriction is to be imposed at all Passport Control Desks for visitors to the UK.

‘Our priority is to ensure that individuals are tall enough to safely participate in the types of activity which take place in Britain on a daily basis,’ said Head of Immigration and Alien Control, Winston Smith. ‘We got the idea from amusement parks as a way of reducing queues.’

The policy was introduced as shorter tourists are thought to contribute less to the economy than normal ones as they tend to eat far less and stay in their hotel rooms due to embarrassment.

‘We’ll be giving special dispensation for dwarves involved in throwing events or pantomine, but those merely seeking to holiday in the UK will be turned back,’ continued Smith. ‘The irony is that while it will mean shorter queues, they will of course be made up of taller people.’

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Posted: Jun 28th, 2013 by Guest

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