The media is today continuing its search for a mystery person who is suspected of talking to David Cameron and possibly influencing his decisions, despite the PM dismissing suggestions that any lobbying had taken place and that any person not involved in such a thing which never happened wasn’t not Lynton Crosby.
The search began after a Downing Street leak confirmed the discovery of an almost intangible u-turn in the kitchen of No. 10, but ‘shocked’ Labour Leader, Ed Miliband, played down any suggestion that an unknown ‘lobbyist’ may have been at work. “I know I’ve been going on about this, but really, given his current popularity, we find it hard to believe that anyone is really lobbying Mr Cameron,’ he said. “I’m sure it’s only a matter of time before we realise that Mr Cameron completely makes his own decisions and that the only mystery person where he shouldn’t be was just Mr Clegg looking for someone to chat to.”
Some had even speculated that the confusion was down to angry union leaders defecting from their traditional Labour-bent to get involved in a “good bit of Tory lobbying”, although more recent evidence suggests that they have merely been caught chatting with Mr Cable about technical aspects of the Cha-cha-cha.
However, some media pundits warned that in the unlikely, almost unbelievable event of such unprecedented ‘lobbying’ being proved, the Tories’ hitherto squeaky clean reputation would be seriously and ‘irreparably tarnished’ for literally minutes to come.