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Prince Philip admits he may not live to offend everyone

still honing 'classic one-liner' on geriatric RoyalsNow in his 93rd year, the Duke of Edinburgh is reported to be ‘philosophical’ about the fact that he may never get through his bucket list of people to upset. As he takes on a lighter workload of public engagements, he accepts that there are many people and communities he ‘will never have the time to reach out to’ with his tactless gaffes and spectacular social blunders.

‘When I started out, it was all so easy,’ said Prince Philip in a recent interview. ‘You could make a comment about slitty-eyed Chinese and go home content with having offended a quarter of the world’s population. Then on your next public outing you’d move on to the French, or the deaf, or whatever. At that rate, I’d have got round to everyone eventually.’

But now, conceded the Duke, society is fragmenting into groups that are multiplying faster than he can think up remarks to outrage them.

‘You’ve got the hearing-impaired, the partially sighted, same-sex this, transgender that… It’s impossible to keep up, but one does one’s best. I mean they’re all unnatural, obviously, but I fear that finding just the right insulting gesture for each and every group is now beyond me. It’s a young man’s game these days.’

And Prince Philip is resigned to the fact that the tradition of making people cringe with embarrassment at public events will likely die with him. ‘Fat chance of Charles keeping my work going after I’m gone. Come to think of it, could somebody check to see if I’ve offended people with big ears yet?’

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Posted: Sep 12th, 2013 by sydalg

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