The manager of struggling Championship side Huddersfield Town, Mark Robins, has expressed his delight today at the form of their new signing God.
‘He gets Himself into the most brilliant positions,’ he said, ‘although He also gets into the most terrible positions at the same time. He seems to be everywhere.’
Town are unbeaten since God’s arrival, although both their wins have been somewhat fortunate. First, opponents Barnsley seemed to literally turn to stone in the last five minutes, and then former league leaders Blackpool, 2-1 up at the time, were struck by an attack of particularly nasty boils. Town eventually won 3-2 after God’s wayward free kick rebounded off a plague of locusts into the Blackpool net.
However, Huddersfield fan Jason Green was unimpressed. ‘It’s all very well signing God Almighty,’ he told the BBC 606 phone-in, ‘but what we really need is a 30-goals-a-season striker and creative midfielder who is prepared to turn out on a Sunday.’