Supernanny resolves the Lebanon conflict
Viewers of Channel 4 last night learned how the so-called “Supernanny” Jo Frost was used to broker a deal between Israel and Hezbollah.
After spending a day watching the two sides fighting, Ms Frost stepped in, ordering Israel to sit on the naughty steppe in the Golan Heights and think carefully about what they had done. After a begrudging apology, the Israelis were then allowed back over the border to continue their air and sea blockade.
Meanwhile Hezbollah’s Russian-made rocket launchers and RPGs were locked in a secure arms dump. Supernanny then told the Islamic terrorists, with a firm voice and constant eye contact, that if they didn’t play nicely the weapons would stay there until Kofi came home.
Both sides were then issued with brightly coloured charts and were awarded stickers for each day that passed without the mass slaughter of innocent civilians. Long suffering neighbour, Jordan praised the approach and its immediate improvement to late night noise and the appearance of the whole area.
Following the successful intervention, there were hopes that Supernanny might head to Iraq, where it was believed warring Shia and Sunni factions could be reconciled by the introduction of a strict bedtime routine. However a Channel 4 spokesman said that ‘Supernanny’ would now be returning to its usual format. ‘Viewers aren’t interested in peace in the Middle East. They just want to watch other people’s children behaving appallingly.’
mitchell adcow (via submissions board)Click to send this story to a friend
Posted: Oct 9th, 2013 by NewsBiscuit
Click for more stories about: From The Archives