The London Fire Service today announced an alarming rise in the number of nuisance calls it is receiving, asking the service to deal with so-called ‘fires’ in buildings.
‘This is thoughtless, reckless beheaviour’ explained Spokesman Ken Norris ‘It wastes our time and detracts from our crucial job work of rescuing cats from trees and posing for calendars.
With the average call out costing the taxpayer around £300 Mr. Norris urged people to be more considerate in their readiness to dial 999. ‘People really ought to be more prepared to fight their own fires. We simply haven’t got the energy to rescue old ladies from burning buildings after a hard night’s stripping or cab driving. The public don’t realise the sacrifices we make in the Fire Service. I mean; did Cuthbert, Dibble and Grubb die rescuing Tibbles from Trumpton Town Hall roof for nothing?’