Following the non-event published in every paper, and leapt upon by every anti-racism group, the non offence caused by Roy Hodgson to anybody has led to the England Manager being coached on how he addresses his players in future.
‘We simply cannot have a manager talking normally to a diverse workforce with players of mixed races without guidance’ said a spokesman for Players Against Nasty Threats & Sayings (Pants).
‘So, we have sent Mr Hodgson a list of terms he can’t use, such as monkey, obviously; dark, white, black, brown, English, ape, foreign, Greek, right-wing, dirty, ghost… the list goes on. Obviously all of these phrases could no doubt be misconstrued by someone somewhere, at some stage, to be a term associated with racism’ he continued. ‘We have also banned the team from visiting any zoos, or safari parks.’
‘To pre-empt further potential offence to other groups, we have strongly urged Mr Hodgson to avoid using any references to getting into players, getting in behind, reaching round, sliding it in to Gerrard, nasty tackle, and forcing it in.’