Dogs having to impregnate too many ‘Sorry You’re Leaving’ cards with bum smells
Leaving collection culture is getting out of hand, according to a survey of dogs who have complained about having to constantly put their signature bottom smell on greetings cards for ever more tenuous reasons.
‘Once it was only when a long-standing pack member was leaving,’ said Monty, a border terrier. ‘These days, the plain brown envelopes come round to celebrate the birth of a colleague’s puppies, a successful de-worming and even a new basket. I’m fed up with having to cock my leg to congratulate some bitch I barely know.’
With dogs struggling to ‘come up with something’ instantly, too many leaving cards are meaningless documents, full of bland smells, according to Molly, a Cockerpoo who recently left Battersea Dog’s Home. In some cases, she added, passive aggression is creeping in. ‘When dogs talk out their arse, it’s not always nice,’ she added.Click to send this story to a friend
Posted: Oct 29th, 2013 by ronseal
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