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Drunk office workers ‘a real hit’ at corporate entertainers’ Xmas party

Entertainers delighted by Graham from Accounts puking in the boss's desk tidyThe first Christmas party solely for the singers and entertainers who make a living performing in tribute acts for corporate parties and balls was declared a ‘resounding success’ by organisers, as attendees were entertained into the night by a large group of drunken office workers.

‘It’s a busy time of year for us, and we perform at a lot of Christmas do’s,’ explained Benny Buongiourno of Italian themed tribute act Abba Mia!, ‘but we’re always stuck onstage, so it’s nice to be able to get an idea of the whole office party experience without having to go to the lengths of actually getting a proper job.’

The event commenced with a silver service dinner where the tribute acts were joined at their tables by ordinary office workers, who then ran the conversational gamut from the problems with the new time-management solution to how ‘the food’s not bad, you know, considering the numbers…’. As the evening drew on, and while the tribute acts enjoyed coffee, the increasingly inebriated office workers slowly made their way to the front of the reception hall, stopping occasionally for close-up sleight-of-hand work at the tables, passing on rumours of office affairs, or drawing attention to some mistletoe attached to their belt buckles.

As the workers united on the stage, the real entertainment of the evening began with the entire office party re-enacting many of the greatest hits of work get-togethers throughout the ages. The show commenced with a solo spot from the lecherous Finance Director, who ‘could really make things happen for you around here’ featuring a surprise appearance from his wife, before the assembled showbiz lookalikes were encouraged to join in the office chorus of ‘you arse-licking bastard, I can’t believe you passed me over for promotion’, and a moving version of ‘next year I’m jacking it in to write a food blog’.

The climax of the evening saw ten photocopiers wheeled onto the dining room’s stage for the middle management synchronised bum photocopying and light show, to the delight of Murphy Richards, a showbiz entertainer billed as The Emerald Isle’s answer to Sir Cliff. ‘At these office Christmas gigs I’ve often heard people mentioning ‘desperate wannabes copying aging arseholes’,’ he noted, ‘but to actually see it happen was a magical experience.’

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Posted: Dec 14th, 2013 by Guest

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