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‘Truffles were ready’ explains Duncan Smith

Work and Pensions Secretary Ian Duncan Smith has defended his decision to walk out of a Commons debate on Food Banks explaining he had received a text message from the Commons canteen to say his truffles were ready.

Duncan-Smith and several other Tory MPs walked out of the session just as the Food Bank debate was raised and headed straight for the Commons restaurant.

The minister explained that the Perigord truffle cannot be left to go cold otherwise it would lose its succulent woodland flavours, ruining a perfectly good Chateau Boissell and making the cheese board virtually unpalatable.

Smith also brushed aside accusations of sneering from Tory colleagues saying the cat-calls were aimed at the house maitr’d for placing the truffle fork to the left of the oyster spoon and not to the left of the lobster snaps ‘as any fool would know’.

‘The truffle fork gaff has left some Tory Cabinet Ministers utterly distraught,’ fumed Duncan-Smith ‘how would you react if the wrong ketchup was served with your fried egg?’

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Posted: Dec 19th, 2013 by Gerontius

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