Under a Labour government teachers would be required to take out annual breakdown cover in order to work in English state schools, announced Shadow education secretary Tristram Hunt yesterday.
Mr Hunt said the emotional stress and strain put upon teachers by current Education Secretary Michael Gove had reached a tipping point and it was now undermining their ability to teach.
Hunt explained that breakdown cover for teachers would include ‘home start’, whereby a recovery agent would come round to the teacher’s house, get them out of bed, shower them, brush their teeth and then make breakfast. ‘Roadside recovery’ would assist teachers suffering a mental break down on their way into work and a trained assistant could comfort any part-time staff found sobbing outside the school gates.
Teachers unable to continue their journey would be found a replacement teacher to take their place. If the roadside mechanic is unable to get any member of staff up and running again they will be put on the back of a low-loader and either taken home, to the nearest A&E or just scrapped.