Elephant in the room died of ‘loneliness and neglect’

The funeral will be held next week of Jumbo,the elephant in the room, who has pined away through lack of attention and, most importantly, never being fed. A spokesman for the elephant community said ‘Jumbo was shunned and now we are stunned. In a room full of people, mostly preoccupied with ‘pushing the envelope’ and ‘picking the low-hanging fruit’, Jumbo died neglected and malnourished. In 2014. Unbelievable. It’s almost like he was invisible.’

The coroner agreed. ‘Tragically, Jumbo just wasted away’, he said. ‘Some of that low-hanging fruit might have just kept him alive. People shouldn’t keep over-sized pachyderms indoors, even as clunky business metaphors, if they’re not prepared to look after them’.


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Posted: Feb 17th, 2014 by

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