Despite not being under any kind of threat, the French Government surrendered today.
‘It was all this talk of 1914, I suppose’, said one minister. ‘Somebody said ‘hey, what if the Germans or somebody attacks again?’, and it was such a lovely day, we were all eating these delicious pastries, we didn’t want to die, so we decided to issue our surrender. Just in case’.
Angela Merkel has asked the French to put their surrender in writing and to keep it open for a few years, on the off chance that Germany might fancy ‘a bit of a fling’ in Europe again.