Max Clifford to represent ‘Bob the Butcher’ and ‘Jimmy the Weasel’

As he adjusts to the privations of prison life, Max Clifford has vowed to keep on working, by representing some of the more notorious characters on C-wing.

‘I’d like to get Jimmy on the cover of the Pentonville Pervert,’ said Clifford, while thumbing the pages of the prison’s prestigious in-house publication, which keeps ‘nonces’ appraised of what’s new in the ever-changing world of under-age and non-consensual sex. ‘Conversely, I’ll do everything in my power to keep Bob’s latest exploits out of the lags’ mags. He’s doing his time, he’s said he’s sorry, and trying to ‘re-configure’ my testicles in the workshop vice was totally out of character.’

While Clifford admitted these ‘inside jobs’ weren’t as glamorous as the celebrity assignments he used to handle, he felt it would be churlish to refuse the other inmates the benefit of his media experience. Churlish, and possibly life-threatening.

Tripod

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Posted: May 2nd, 2014 by

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