‘I’m a very lucky man,’ said a beaming Michael Barnes, who has recently found an exotic new girlfriend after phoning a number on the wall of the toilets in his local pub, the Dog and Trumpet. After he rang and made a date, he and Sadie Foxxx swiftly became an item.
‘She’s got expensive tastes, every date costs a fortune. But, hell, she’s a real looker and, for an ex-convent girl, very broad-minded. Let’s face it, not every woman is happy to have sex on the first date.’
So impressed has Barnes been with his toilet wall-derived good fortune that he is planning a visit to a local poultry farm on the same basis. ‘I’ve never done this “cock fun” before, but hey, it’s got to be worth a try…’