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‘Our day has come,’ carrier bag survivalists gloat

With a 5p charge in place for supermarket plastic bags now in place, it has emerged that many wise souls have been stockpiling theirs for many years by carefully folding their pristine supermarket flimsys inside the so-called Bags for Life and stashing them in cool, dry environments away from direct sunlight

‘There have been some tragedies on the way,’ admitted veteran ‘bagger’ Norbert Fulop from Peckham. ‘Some inexperienced baggers have broken the seals only to find that some of the biodegradable carriers have quietly disintegrated into mysterious confetti.’

Collectors of branded carriers from retro-chic outlets are finding their ‘low density polyethylene gold’ commanding a high price, with some old Woolworths carriers worth as much as 50p. Meanwhile post-modernists are flaunting PoundLand and Lidl bags at prestige events in a new ironic trend dubbed ‘wanking’.

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Posted: Jun 5th, 2014 by Squudge

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