The neighbours of tedious folkie Oak Hamilton have complained to the council today after he finally bought a hammer, after a prolonged campaign of singing about his intention, and insisted on hammering ‘in the morning, in the noontime and in the evening’, in his terraced house in Leeds.
‘It’s only a little house, I can’t think what still needs doing’, said Mrs. Warburton at number 32. ‘I knocked and asked him, but he just said it was his hammer of justice. The Yorkshire Ripper used a hammer, you know. Didn’t cause as much disruption as Mr. Hamilton, though’.
Mr. Hamilton is also accused of singing endless sea shanties, which are possibly inaccurate first person accounts unless he’s referring to the Leeds – Liverpool Canal, in which case there’s a possibility of slight exaggeration.