Prompted by the way minor celebrities take to Twitter to announce their sadness at the death of a real celebrity they never met and hope their tweet gets reported on TV, the microblogging site is to offer a new celebrity funeral service.
On hearing the news about Twitter, Adam Butterworth, who once appeared in Hollyoaks in 2011, tweeted to his followers ‘Sad to hear about the death of proper celebrity funerals, they were a great inspiration to me. RIP.’
Adam forwarded his Tweet to Piers Morgan, who then re-tweeted the story to his own band of followers, adding ‘Agreed, a really sad loss. Will be missed by millions’. They then re-tweeted it to all of their mates after adding further tributes and messages of sympathy.
‘All this does not mean that the proper celebrity will be forgotten’ added a Twitter spokesman. ‘After all there’s always the memorial service. Unfortunately Facebook beat us to it and has entered into an exclusive contract for those. Bastards.’