Rabbits ‘have no intention of punching the Pope’

Despite Pope Francis’s provocative insinuation that their mothers breed ‘like Catholics’, a spokes-rabbit has confirmed that modern rabbits are mature and civilised enough to avoid violence. They will instead invite His Holiness to sit down with rabbit representatives and constructively discuss the different approach to birth control by mothers in the two species.

The Pope has reminded Catholics that using man-made technology to avoid pregnancy is cheating, since it was unfair not to allow God a fighting chance of imposing His will on them in the form of an unwanted child they had no means of looking after. Meanwhile, local pharmacist John Spencer has offered the rabbits a special contraceptive operation guaranteed to prevent unwanted pregnancies, or indeed mothers, in conjunction with the pie shop next door.


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Posted: Jan 23rd, 2015 by

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