Royal re-burials set to replace Bank Holidays

In a move aimed at filling the gaps between naturally occurring Royal births and deaths, the government is planning to replace existing Bank Holidays with a programme of Royal re-burials.

It is understood that the Queen Mother would be the first to exhumed on a ‘last in first out basis’, and that she will be taken to Milton Keynes on May Day 2016 and re-buried on a local trading estate, in a ceremony which will coincide with the opening of a nearby Premier Inn.

The decision has angered business owners in seaside towns, who traditionally profit through the sale of hot dogs and Cagoules to the dysfunctional masses who queue for hours in traffic, before eventually pay-parking and waddling around arguing in the pissing rain.

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Posted: Mar 27th, 2015 by

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