‘Frankly I don’t think I put my case across as well as I could have,’ said David Cameron, announcing that interpretive dance would be part of the second party leaders’ election date. ‘Samantha suggested this because she thinks I’m a real smooth mover.’
Ed Miliband stated he was up for the challenge. ‘I know I was criticised for being a bit wooden, but I’ve been dosing up on Seven Seas since then and I’ve discovered the added mobility that a diet high in bacon sandwiches affords me,’ he added.
Nigel Farage insisted that his Morris dancing skills would ‘wipe the board’, while Nicola Sturgeon expressed concern that her Scottish Country dancing was very rusty. Plaid Cymru did not comment, but is understood to be tabling an alternative proposal, including a spitting contest.