Houses of Parliament identified as source of dark matter

CERN scientists have started drilling beneath Westminster in order to collect ‘high concentrations of anti-matter’. The levels being released into the community have been shown to be damaging to the public over large areas of Hackney and other North London boroughs as well as Tyneside.

After consultation with Health & Safety executives, scientists were particularly interested in limiting the output of the Department of Work and Pensions and warned staff working in close proximity to Iain Duncan Smith of ‘taking in too much of this stuff’’.

The public have been made aware that the risk is not restricted to Government buildings as hot spots are known to exist near to retirement homes populated by ex Tory ministers. Michael Howard was not available for comment.

Robert Koch

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Posted: Jun 4th, 2015 by

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