Public welcomes return of ‘good old-fashioned scandal’

The scandal surrounding Lord Sewel is, according to the British public, a heartwarming return to the traditional values of scandals that rocked the establishment in the past.

‘It seemed like those glorious days of opening the paper over our morning cuppa and being treated to the bizarre sexual proclivities of the establishment were long gone,’ said Pete, from Cheltenham, ‘But Sewel, bless him, has changed all that. It’s like David Mellor and his bit on the side in the nineties all over again. Or Edwina Currie with whatshisname. You know the one, the liontamer from Surrey – or is it Kent?’

‘It’s a lovely return to what Britain does best, really, when you think about it,’ added John from East Ham. ‘We’ve had all these reports of accusations against members of the establishment being involved in heinous crimes against young people and the like. It’s all been a bit upsetting. So it’s lovely to hear again a life-affirming tale of a doddery old peer snorting ‘coca’ off a whore’s tits while chairman of the privileges and conduct committee. Now that’s more like it.’

‘Lord Sewel, sir, the nation salutes you.’

S J Roe

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Posted: Jul 27th, 2015 by

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