Latest UK Government Mastercard statement shows drunken purchase of Cuba

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The hunt was on today to reveal the name of the high ranking civil servant who has apparently used his or her Government Mastercard to buy the Caribbean island of Cuba. The purchase was made late on Tuesday night at the ‘Che’ bar and nightclub in downtown Havana and investigators are working on the theory that the Civil servant involved may have been lulled into the deal with several earlier rounds of ‘Cuba Libre’s. The statement has revealed that Cuba was actually quite expensive after all.

‘All of us have spent a little bit more on our credit card than we intended to at one time or another. But we think one of our chaps may have gone a little bit too far this time,’ said a Foreign Office spokesman.

The Cuban government is said to be delighted with the purchase following on from an appeal for more international investment by Rauol Castro and the colossal payment has already sorted out some holes in the island’s finances. Worse followed when it was discovered that the civil servant may have significantly overpaid. ‘You know what it’s like in these places late at night when you’ve had a few.’ said the barman. ‘They see you coming, if you know what I mean.’

The UK government is now wondering what to do with its new purchase. One idea is a special resort for UK holiday makers who have been in trouble abroad. Some facilities already exist but the government says they will be improved and expanded. Officials described it as being a wonderful location with stunning views right across Guantanamo bay.

Team Biscuit

30th August 2008

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