Hope is starting to fade, as the search for the mobile belonging to Elly Woodcock (15) has reached the 197th second or the ‘point of no return’ according to her younger brother, Tom (a cynical 9). [read...]
Police have confirmed that a non-celebrity death has taken place in Manchester earlier today. A spokesman stated that it was being treated as ‘unusual’ that the man, Derek Walpole, wasn’t known as a famous celebrity. [read...]
A Manchester man has publicly thanked his assailant, after the removal of his selfie stick from his anal cavity revealed potentially serious problems with his prostate gland. [read...]
The Grim Reaper was unveiled as the new 2017 host of I’m a Celebrity…Get Me Out of Here today, after impressing producers throughout 2016 during a series of screen tests. Grim will take over from Ant and Dec, [read...]
Arthur Robinson has launched a formal complaint against the emergency services after he suffered a catalogue of poor service on Christmas Day. ‘I woke up with a bit of a sore throat. OK, it isn’t meningitis, [read...]
