The debate on whether Donald Trump should be banned from entering the UK has ended with MPs casting a spell which will see the property tycoon roam the earth among the festering ranks of the undead until Judgement Day.
‘We knew that ultimately we couldn’t vote to ban Trump from the UK, which made the debate feel a bit pointless’ said Labour MP Jack Dromey. ‘So instead we cursed him to restlessly wander the earth after his death lamenting the opportunities he missed to help mankind while he was alive’.
Trump is the first person to be subjected to an MPs curse since the practice died out in the 1970s after a bungled spell led to the rise of Margaret Thatcher.
‘We can’t punish Trump while he is alive’ said Dromey. ‘But we felt it reasonable to condemn him to an afterlife of wandering among the tormented hordes of brain dead zombies. He’s spent the last year travelling America speaking to Republican voters so he probably won’t notice much difference’.