Right-wing sleeper ‘Jezzer’ Corbyn and left-wing sleeper Donald ‘Lenin’ Trump are to be exchanged on the Glienicke Bridge connecting Potsdam with Berlin, following intense diplomatic manoeuvres.
‘Corbyn is a war hero. A Cold War hero who kept our democracy safe from communists’ said an emotional David Cameron as he awaited the exchange. ‘He went deeper undercover than any man should be asked to go. Vegetarian food! What more could one ask? He walked a tightrope, always in danger of being unmasked. I ask you, how many Jeremies could walk into a working men’s club with their brother Piers and come out alive? Come on home, Jezzer, we’ve kept the sow’s head ready.’
American Democrats fear that years of feigning insanity might really have driven Donald Trump mad, like that bloke on Colditz. ‘We fear he might be genuinely insane’, said Hilary Clinton, ‘like that bloke on Colditz.’