‘I was looking for buyers for Tata Steel in Australia’, says Business Secretary

Hop off

‘I knew that if I did nothing thousands of jobs would go, but I’d been sworn to secrecy and had forgotten to cross my fingers in the heat of the moment,’ explained Sajid Javid.  ‘So I thought to myself ‘where is warm, serves cold beer and builds up masses of airmiles at the taxpayers’ expense?’

That destination was Australia, which the Business Secretary thought might be ‘as unlikely to fork out lots of money to save the steel industry as any other country – plus I fancied a holiday’.

He admitted to ‘feeling rotten’ at having to miss the trip to Mumbai to represent British interests – ‘the extra airmiles would have come in handy’ – but insisted pretending not to have a clue as to what was going on was:  ‘great acting practice which will come in handy when it’s my turn to be quizzed over tax avoidance’.

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Posted: Apr 13th, 2016 by

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