‘You only get ONE life’ warns risk-averse tax accountant

A risk-averse tax accountant from London has today warned friends and family that ‘you only get ONE life’.

42 year-old Simon Walker, who has worked at financial services practice Thornton McGrath for 17 years, is concerned that those closest to him are ‘treating their existence like a dress rehearsal’, whilst he continues to seize every moment in his purpose-built office block. When not at his desk, Simon shares his leisure time between posting inspirational quotes on social media such as ‘Life always offers another chance. It’s called tomorrow’ and prudently checking his Blackberry for any work emails of seismic importance.

‘We’re here to change the world. Not just follow rules, earn money and die,’ remarked Simon, after typing some numbers into a colour-coded Excel spreadsheet called ‘Accounts’. ‘You have to surround yourself with people who inspire you’, he continued, as his colleague Keith whinged that the stationery cupboard was permanently low on staples. ‘And if your dreams don’t scare you, they’re not big enough,’ he concluded, after feeling comforted by recent nightmares about a giant hamster wheel.


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Posted: Aug 22nd, 2016 by

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