New fiver ‘wholly unsuitable’ as builders notepads

worth £1

The National Federation of Builders has slammed the new £5 note which cannot be written on with one of those weird, flat, soft pencils.

The plastic notes which entered circulation today are also impervious to being torn, rolled, folded into amusing caricatures of the Queen, or being worth shit in 3 years time – according to the Bank of England.

‘Without anywhere to write down imperial measurements and bacon butty orders, the UK construction industry will collapse faster than a cheap conservatory,’ said a bloke in the passenger seat of a white van, whilst casually browsing a copy of The Daily Sport. ‘I can do you one though -proper- for £200 mate,’ he added.

Iroquois Pliskin

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Posted: Sep 13th, 2016 by

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