Kim Jong-un set to explode


Notorious salad-dodger Kim Jong-un’s waistline could go critical following recent underground consumption tests, scientists have warned.

‘Though North Korea’s fathead miniaturisation attempts have made little progress in recent years, Kim’s personal ‘enrichment’ programme has gathered momentum with a pace that he last knew as a 7 year old,’ said an expert on the Communist State’s Dictator-Weaponisation Programme.

‘He could go off, without warning, taking out the whole Pyongyang in the process,’ he continued. ‘Imagine trying clear up 10,000 boxes of shouting, angry fried noodles that will shoot you if you take too long about it.’

Iroquois Pliskin

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Posted: Sep 15th, 2016 by

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