Brexit to increase number of hipsters in coffee shops


Coffee shops are bracing themselves for an influx of unemployed hipsters as the full effects of Brexit take hold. With a likely increase in unemployment, particularly in the IT and finance sectors, some coffee shops are even installing discount beads and moustache wax concession stands.

Barry Calderbank from 50 Degrees coffee in Nottingham said: ‘Our trade is already 30% hipster, but with certain sectors about to be hit hard by Britain’s collective cliff-jump into economic obscurity, many more people with an arts or humanities degree are going to be flooding into our coffee shop to write the crap novel their job has previously prevented them from inflicting on Kindle readers.’

While many sectors are now concerned about a downturn, the hipster coffee shop economy appears to be booming. ‘Many people are blowing their redundancy money on a daily large mocha and an almond croissant. Lots of them would have traveled if it wasn’t for the pound being lower than their own self esteem. That’s great news for bean grinders’ said Mr Calderbank.

Other sectors believed to be in growth as a result of the UK’s teetering economy are believed to be any that involve being paid in dollars.

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Posted: Oct 16th, 2016 by

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