Accountant Nicky Smith from Ipswich, accosted her friend by the photocopier at 09:23 this morning with the opener: ‘Ask me about Saturday, go on, ask me’, to which the response was: ‘Yeah, but wait until you hear about mine’. [read...]
Having already scraped the Trans-Pacific trade pact, Mr. Trump swore to only sign future agreements on parchment made from human skin and with the blood of ‘liberals’. One eyewitness, who saw the President complete the summoning, [read...]
The Health Secretary claims waiting for an egg to boil was costing the country billions and more was needed to tackle the problem. While researchers at BBC NHS Week revealed that some egg-eaters were having to wait up to four minutes for their eggs to boil while others were turning to alternative cooking methods such as scrambling or frying. [read...]
Dear polones and homies (mostly omi-polonies) how bona to vada your ruddy eek, our very own dishy President Tooting Fakement, King of the Naffs! [read...]
His wife seemed unfazed and, if anything, a little excited. [read...]
