Henrietta Rawlinson, 43, from Cheltenham, has reported her severe discombobulation after steering her Land Rover Discovery into the back of a Skoda Fabia in the car park at Waitrose this morning on the way home from the school run. Mrs Rawlinson had thought she was taking the last empty space, only to find that it was occupied by a Skoda Fabia that was entirely hidden from view as it was not only equidistant from the white lines but parked well inside the parking bay.
‘I don’t know how I was supposed to notice that little tin can hiding away behind the Mercedes GLS, really I don’t,’ she told reporters at a hastily convened press conference. ‘All the Audi Q7s and Range Rover Sports were parked exactly as you would expect, at angles of 30 to 45 degrees, across two bays and jutting out five feet so everyone could see them. I tried to stop, of course I did, but how was I meant to go from 40 to zero in the space of two yards?’
Waitrose has apologized to Mrs Rawlinson for the trauma she has suffered in having to have her bull bars straightened out at Halfords on the Tewkesbury Road. Regional director James McAlinden has confirmed that they have sent her a year’s supply of Charlie Bigham’s organic pies and Heston from Waitrose Earl Grey & Lemon Gin by way of compensation.
‘Although we have no legal liability, we do feel partially to blame,’ McAlinden said. ‘The totalled car turned out to belong to an off-duty Accident & Emergency nurse from Gloucester who had for some months been exploiting our good nature by going in for her free latte every day and sitting reading the papers for the full two hours of customer parking. We trust she has learned her lesson but we are not vindictive people and are willing to pay her bus fare home if she gets in touch.’