Former Chancellor of the Exchequer George Osborne has declined an invitation by the London Evening Standard to be interviewed about his political career, his life after Number 11, his relationship with David Cameron and his new jobs in the city.
‘Try as he might, the new editor of the Standard isn’t getting a peep out of me,’ Osborne said. ‘We all know what the media can get up to and in this time of political instability I am saving my efforts for the people of Tatton, who I have the honour to represent in the House of Commons. I simply have no time for such an interview, even if I had the inclination to accept the invitation.’
However, sources inside the Standard, run by Russian oligarch heir Eugene Ledbedev say the paper may have a mysterious ‘back door’ into emails and letters sent and received by Osborne, as well as details of his relationships with Boris Johnson. The paper is already threatening to reveal all, should Osborne continue to resist being interviewed.
‘I can’t tell you how we have this information, some of which is expected to be quite shocking’ the source said. ‘But the Standard editorial team will shortly be in a position to know everything about the former Chancellor, from the brand of toothpaste he uses to the colour of his light blue underpants to the names he calls his intimates. We’ll have access to his emails, his phone calls, even his conversations with his wife, servants, accountant, dentist, children chiropodist and cat.’
Osborne has dismissed these claims as ‘ridiculous.’ He told the Standard: ‘We are surely reaching a post-factual world when a reputable newspaper can claim with any degree of seriousness that it has inside knowledge of the life and work of any politician, myself included. Whoever this mysterious ‘source’ is claiming the Standard has access to this material had better be absolutely sure of his or her facts. Frankly, I think it’s a bizarre fantasy created by someone who, let’s face it, has no idea how the newspaper industry works. The Standard will be claiming it knows what I’m going to do next!’