George Osborne has been racking his brains trying to remember the other thing he was sure he was meant to be doing after becoming editor of the London Evening Standard. ‘It’s been nagging at me all day,’ said the former Chancellor. ‘It’s not my job at Black Rock, or my after dinner speaking commitments, or the family wallpaper business. What the hell was it?’
Critics have said that Osborne should not be taking on other roles outwith representing the people of his Tatton constituency. ‘Tatton! That rings a bell,’ said Osborne. ‘I used to know the blighter who was the MP there years ago. Neil Hamilton – he was always on the telly with his wife when he should have been concentrating on doing his day job. What a plum’.