Right wing leader Marine Le Pen has given equally rightwing leader Vladimir Putin a pen from her Le Pen range of pens
In an acceptance speech Mr Putin said ‘I will use this Le Pen pen to sign executive orders to round up and imprison illegal and unpatriotic protestors, as well as writing about the deleterious effects of homosexuality. I might even use the pen to make humorous drawings of people who are less than perfect ethnic specimins of Russian humanity, and to sign official denials that I have ordered the brutal murders of those who oppose me.’
The Russian President continued: ‘They say the Le Pen is mightier than the le sword and that may be so in France very soon. Although Madame Le Pen, if elected, may use le machine gun as well as well as le arrest and imprisonment without le trial. And Marine’s friends in Europe may find they enjoy a le Pen pen for the writing on the wall about how immigrants and other undesirable elements are to be contained. I understand Mr Farage’s le Pen pen is kept secretly in his top pocket with his union Jackie hankie!
‘Elsewhere in the world, though, innocent children are finding les Russian helicopter gunships mightier than the pen. That is just the way it is at the moment’ concluded the President.