Lineker enters hibernation pod as season draws to a close

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Preparations were underway at BBC Broadcasting House in London today to ensure that Gary Lineker’s summer hibernation place was ready for the Match of the Day host’s annual period of dormancy.

Mr Lineker has been showing signs of tiredness recently so the producers at the BBC were especially thorough in creating this years nest for him.  Being that most of the talking points for this season’s Premier League have now ended with champions and relegated teams already in place, his Match of the Day dialogues have become rambling with frequent mentions of his nest which have confused viewers.

‘We’ve decided to set up a live webcam this year for Gary’s hibernation preparations, so the viewers can really understand how he tends to work’, Bryan Harries, a producer for MOTD, told us.  ‘He didn’t get too much time off last year due to the European Cup so is especially weary this year.  We’ve lined his nest with old Spurs and Everton shirts and washed his favourite Leicester City onesie.’

As is tradition, Mr Lineker will enter a fugue like state after the last MOTD on Sunday evening and dozily sniff around for Prawn Cocktail Walkers Crisps.  They will be arranged in a trail ending at his old leather boot and football shirt lined abode, where he will sleep for the next 2 months.  As the first few friendlies begin to be played and transfer speculation becomes frenzied, Mr Lineker will be woken by a referee’s whistle.  It is a particularly dangerous time as he will seek to mate immediately following his wakening which is why Alan Hansen will no longer appear with him on MOTD.

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Posted: May 21st, 2017 by

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