Human statues far more annoying than Confederate ones

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In the wake of violent protests and the removal of controversial statues across the USA, human statues are reporting an increase in hate crimes.  In some instances, human statues have had to flee for their lives, leaving behind their day’s takings as crowds of torch wielding white supremacists and alt-left opponents battle over their right to stay in place on street corners and at the bottom of escalators.

‘I’m used to the odd stray mutt taking a leak on my sandals,’ said Barry Chambers, who poses as Julius Caesar outside Caesars Palace in LA, ‘but to have torch wielding mobs surround you and other idiots screaming ‘Romans go home’ and ‘you killed Jesus’, is just too darn much.’ Elsewhere, mime artists are electing to perform their routines inside a perfectly clear glass box to protect themselves from projectiles.

(hattip Adrian Bamforth)

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Posted: Aug 18th, 2017 by

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