At a modest £1,149, the iPhone X is this year’s must have accessory for the destitute; alongside a dog, a copy of the Big Issue and the smell of wee. The new device comes with inbuilt GPS to remind you where you used to live and a ‘poo emoji’ to tell you how shit your… [read...]
Parents of a child who is a school with other children who are clearly not called Callum have withdrawn their child from education. Speaking to the press this morning, Mr and Mrs Price of Hampshire say Callum came home asking why other children had a names other than Callum. [read...]
Winds strong enough to blow an umbrella inside-out have been battering the Home Counties overnight. Reports have been coming in of amazing acts of bravery and endurance from residents across the region as they battle to survive the elements. [read...]
Householders have been warned to ‘stay indoors and keep away from the internet’ by government experts worried about the dangers of information. Considerable amounts of information have escaped since the Freedom of Information Act came into law and much of it is potentially hazardous to the general public. [read...]
