Hampshire’s pheasants are expressing anger at Aung San Suu Kyi’s silence as they are beaten from their natural habitats and shot in cold blood. Survivors have reported seeing fern patches being trampled upon, with smoke rising from the ends of shot-guns as defenceless birds come under attack by wax-coated-madmen or ‘Barbourians’, as they have become widely known.
The beatings and shootings contradict Aung San Su Kyi’s claims that there are no hunting operations going on in the County. The latest violence has sent an estimated 7,500 pheasant refugees fleeing to the suburbs of Surrey in less than a month. ‘Our homes and bramble patches continue to get ransacked, before, during and after their inhabitants take flight in terror’, said pheasant representative Phyllis Flockhart as she guided her brood to safety across a dangerous stretch of the A31. ‘Not satisfied with simply forcing us from our homes, these Barbourians seem intent on ensuring that we have no homes to return to’.
‘We are bracing ourselves for even more trouble in the weeks to come.’