Calls for background checks before states can buy nuclear weapons

nuclear_weapons

Growing awareness of the dangers posed by nuclear weapons has led to calls for ‘thorough background checks’ before states are allowed to buy them. ‘We need to be sure a state doesn’t have a history of using nukes,’ said a US spokesman. ‘And there has to be a three-day waiting period, so we know whoever ends all life on Earth isn’t just making an emotional decision they might later regret. No, not America – that’s different.’

However, the owner of a nuke store said the new regulations were unworkable. ‘Only the other day I was selling some ICBMs to a Chinese guy, seemed totally legit, when I looked out of the window and saw a group of Koreans waiting in his car. At least, I think they were Koreans – they all look alike to me, especially after their faces have melted off in the 5,000 degree heat of the initial blast.’

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Posted: Oct 12th, 2017 by

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