Henry Willis, a 6 year-old pupil at Tunbridge Primary in Kent, has become increasingly agitated about his long-term financial security. In a heated discussion with parents, Geoff and Lynn, about family net worth, he was infuriated to learn that additional savings were not being offset to generate lower mortgage interest repayments. After unearthing a significant number of poor financial decisions, he has insisted that all future investment strategies are to be signed off by him.
In addition, Henry’s counsel on meaningful diversification has continued to fall on his fathers’ deaf ears. His attempts to explain the amazing power of compound interest to his mother remain hopelessly unfulfilled. The most vexing problem of all, however, persists in the ceramic piggy bank on his shelf whose value can be crushed by inflation.
He spoke to Newsbiscuit, “I told Dad that we should forgo the US summer trip to Disneyworld and instead take the tent to Skegness, using the savings to pay down our most expensive unsecured debt. But he refused to negotiate, and Mum had tears in her eyes. Mickey and Minnie are going to bleed this family dry. Is the Magic Kingdom available for squatters when our house is repossessed? Will Goofy ensure my junior ISA is maximised in the next tax year? My parents live in cloud cuckoo land.”
More and more parents are presently seeking independent financial advice from their children. Some mums and dads have become accustomed to asking their offspring for mathematical assistance in calculating a percentage tip. Their sophisticated little ones are also now demanding pocket money via standing order so that payments are regular and on time. Finally, a young girl from Sussex has stipulated that her weekly £5 allowance should track the FTSE 100, permitting a more aggressive risk-return profile.