Robert Mugabe has gone phishing


Dear Respected One,

I speak to you on a matter of great importance. I, Robert Mugabe, the one true President of Zimbabwe, am being held under house arrest in Harare by treacherous elements of the Zimbabwe Defence Forces under the command of its chief conspirator Constantino Chiwenga. I can report that I am well but fearful of a great calamity which will surely fall upon this country unless I am freed from this apprehension. My captors are nothing less than criminals and mercenaries, paid for and in the pockets of western imperialist pigs!

It is for this reason that urgently request your help; during my tenure in office I amassed a vast personal fortune from gifts and donations by grateful Zimbabweans equivalent to many millions of dollars, kept in an offshore bank account for use in the event of a coup by unscrupulous generals. Alas, due to my current containment, it has been impossible to release these funds without the assistance of a foreign agent. Sir, we are honourably seeking your assistance in the following ways:

1. To provide a Bank account where this money would be transferred to.

2. Pay a small release fee to facilitate transfer of the cash through international channels.

For this generous assistance, we are willing to offer you 15% of the fortune as compensation for effort after the successful transfer of these fund.

I am looking forward to hearing back from you. Make Zimbabwe great again!

President Robert Mugabe



(hattip Sinnick)

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Posted: Nov 19th, 2017 by

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