Brexit And Northern Ireland – a handy guide to who’s who and what’s what

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What is the Irish border?

The Irish border was the splitting of Ireland by the British government in 1922 designed to try and stop political violence over the issue of Irish independence. This was wholly successful, if you don’t count the last 95 years of subsequent political violence over the issue of Irish independence.

Who are the main players in the current situation?

The British and Irish governments, the EU negotiating team and nationalists and unionists in Ireland.

What role does the camp Justin Trudeau impersonator have in all this?

I think that is probably Leo Varadkar, the Irish Taoiseach.

Oh, okay. So, the unionists in Ireland are presumably the ones who support the European Union then?

No, the unionists hate the European Union and the EEA as they say they oppose being told what to do by an unelected person from a foreign country. They also vehemently insist that they should be ruled over by an English/German monarch.

So they want nothing to do with EU or the EEA?

Yes……..well, apart from having unfettered access to the EU and the EEA by demanding that there be no noticeable border in Ireland, even though their only policy for the last century has been to make the border more noticeable. They also now say that there needs to be free movement of trade and people across this border.

Sort of like being in the EU and the EEA then?

Yes, but presumably in a much more British way.

What do the nationalists want?

The nationalists want to hand over their country’s political sovereignty to unelected foreigners, despite having fought against being ruled by unelected foreigners since approximately 1169AD.

Do most Irish people get the irony of all this?

Nope.

Do a slim majority (51.9%) of British people get the irony of their desire for political independence being scuppered by their preventing the political independence of another country for the last 800 years?

I doubt it.

What has happened to the Northern Ireland assembly?

Jesus, just don’t ask about that fecking thing, all right.

jamsieoconner, Hat-Tip to A.L. Shaw

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Posted: Nov 28th, 2017 by

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